This past week I fought the flu, and my body wasn’t pleased. While lying in bed, one has much time to think and reflect. And a thought kept occurring to me as I lay listening to my boys play.
I don’t want to miss it.
I don’t want to mess this up.
I don’t want to look back when I am 80 and think about all the should-haves.
Social media has many benefits, but for myself, I have noticed a significant drawback: time.
Blogging, posting, podcasting, and the like take time. I have pulled back from social media many times and have yet to regret that time away.
Over the years I feel that society has put pressure on women that being a mom is not enough. We must hustle. We must work. We must do something other than just being a mom. But being a mom is the biggest, most important job God has given us. We are physically imprinting and raising the next generation. When I look around at the world now, I think we are seeing the effects of the lack of parenting has had. The negative impact of both parents working full-time, putting off raising kids onto nannies, teachers, daycares, schools and babysitters, the lack of stability and good Christian foundations . . . we are seeing it now. And I don’t want to be a part of it. I want to return to June Cleaver’s time and be that housewife caring for my family. Go back to basics and be one hundred percent present in all aspects of my children’s lives. Cook and bake. Homeschool. Read the Bible together. Not concerned about what to post or how many people ‘liked’ an image or seeing what someone else is doing.
My direct influence is here in my house. With my kids and my husband. I kept telling myself that I am sharing the Gospel so that is ok to post and stay on social. But I must pay attention to this nudge that it is time to step away. Maybe permanently? I am not sure, but I am sure that I get one shot at being a mother and raising Christian men who respect their future wives and know how to be great fathers. Who will go into the world strong and resilient against temptations and know the Truth. This world is so corrupt and the messages being funneled into our brains and feeds are primarily lies. We are being misled little by little, desensitized more and more. When I am 80, I am not going to look back at my social media and think, well done! But what I will look back on is my time with my kids and my role as their mother. I want to see my boys fully grown with wives and children of their own and know that I did the best I could and raised them entirely focused on them and God.
I am personally reclaiming my role as a housewife and stay-at-home mom fully and proudly. And to say that most women cannot do that, I think, is a lie we tell ourselves. We just can’t homeschool because it is hard or our kids are challenging. We can’t afford to lose a paycheck. Yet we spend gobs of money on preschool, dining out and coffees, on homes that are out of our budgets, on décor and parties that are only temporary.
We get one chance.
Our kids are worth our time. They DESERVE our time and full attention. They deserve a mom who cooks meals for them and reads to them. They are not burdens we are to put off on someone else and just hope they turn out okay. It is our responsibility. God has given us these children. Let us reclaim motherhood and all that it entails. Step back to the 50s role of the housewife and abandon these feminist ideals that we must do it all. That we can have it all. That we can work and raise kids and do it both equally well. WE CANNOT. One will always get out of balance. And where will the pendulum swing?
I don’t share all of this to make any mom or woman feel bad, but I do hope it sparks a thought. An evaluation. Why are we so busy? Why are we striving so hard for things that are not of great importance? Is it for wealth? For stature? For recognition? What is the driving force behind what we do? I have done it many times and found myself in the wrong place. And thus, why I am back to this same thought of it is enough. It is time to stop trying to busy myself and hustle because I have put this pressure on myself. No one else has but only myself. I have told myself that being a mom is not enough. I must do something else – sell this or that, write this or publish that, blog about this or podcast that. Work or do something more.
But enough is enough.
I would love to say that this is the last blog post that I write or that my book was the one and only, but I can’t say that or promise that. But I will say that currently, in this stage of my life, my role as a mother is the most significant and heftiest role that I have, and I will do it thoroughly and entirely with no more interruptions. No more social media to distract me. No more things of this world to compete for my attention. For now, I am done.
I pray that wherever you are today, in whatever role you face, you acknowledge Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior and turn to Him. Because He is all that we need.
Blessings to you all,